Linguistic humor, Merger mania

A number of years ago there was a proposed merger between Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers. Rumor had it that the new company would be called Fairwell Honeychild.

There is a merger in the works involving Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler. It will be called Poly-Warner-Cracker.

There has long been a rumor that W.R. Grace Co. was going to buy the Fuller Brush Co. and Mary Kay Cosmetics and then merge with the Hale Business Systems. This would result in the new megacorporation Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

Don't forget the failed merger between Yahoo and Netscape: Net'n'Yahoo. It didn't work out because they were afraid they would have to relocate the headquarters to Tel Aviv.

Others in the works:

3M and Goodyear: mmmGood

John Deere and Abitibi-Price: Deere Abi

Honeywell and Imasco and Home Oil: Honey, I'm Home

Denison Mines and Alliance and Metal Mining: Mine, All Mine

3M and JC Penney and Canadian Opera Company: 3 Penney Opera

Grey Poupon and Dockers Pants: Poupon Pants

Knott's Berry Farm and National Organization of Women: Knott NOW

Crabtree Evelyn and Apple Computer: Crab Apple

Swissair and Cheseborough-Ponds: Swisscheese

Zippo Manufacturing and Audi and Dofasco and Dakota Mining: Zip Audi Do Da